Ok....so I "borrowed" this title from a book I am currently reading. In my defense, it is the only thing that sums up the way I feel about life in general...particularly my marriage and our endeavor in parenthood together. You see, I wasn't always a stay-at-home mommy. I worked in the banking industry for 14 years prior to our fourth child being born and, consequently, me choosing to stay home with our babies.
I was so thrilled to finally be able to obtain my dream job (24/7 mommy), that I made a conscious decision to make every day with my babies count. I made a decision that if we were at home and one of them said, "Mommy, let's play!" I would never look at them and say, "Sorry...mommy's too busy." Now, they may have to wait a few minutes so that I can finish up something I am in the middle of doing...but, if they want to play then we play. And, if it's absolutely something that must be done, then I let them help me. And, we make it fun.
As a result, my house is "well lived in". There are typically dishes waiting for me after the kids go to bed and toys in pretty much every room in the house. But, everytime I become overwhelmed by this sight, I remember how blessed I am to have little people around to make this mess. I also know that there will come a day when I will miss them desperately and will think about how quickly the time passed.
And, so brings another conscious decision now that I have been home with them for a year...I will be sure to thoroughly enjoy each day...not just coasting through it. I will pay attention to details and photograph them with my mind.. I will smile everytime I hear my husband leave me a voicemail and how after almost 8 years and 4 babies, he aways starts his message with, "Hey, gorgeous...". I will keep a memory of Madison asking me to give her my "extra special Mama back scratch" at bed time. I will remember how when I tell David how proud I am of him, his precious little nose wrinkles up as he smiles and beams with pride himself. I will remember how our curly-haired Livvy can go from sweet to furious and back again within seconds...and look adorable the entire time. And, I will capture the feeling of slow dancing with Sammy every single night before I set him in his crib...and the moment when he lays his sweet head on my shoulder and puts his fat little arm around me.
As at-home parents (mommy's or daddy's) it can be easy to be sucked into such a routine that we forget to stop sometimes and just enjoy our babies and our spouses. There are so many terrible things in the news everyday and I am positive that most involved in those stories would give anything for a typical day...one with a list of errands a mile long, breaking up arguments amongst their kids and maybe just sitting with their spouse after a long day and talking.
I can say from personal experience that if you choose joy long enough, eventually it just becomes who you are...someone who enjoys the Gift of an Ordinary Day.
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Bedtime....A Clean Slate
As I was snuggling with the kids at bedtime, it occurred to me just how forgiving they are. Today was not an exciting day in our house. I have mastitis, and feel like I've been hit by a truck. But, as all stay-at-home parents can attest to, the show must go on!
Normally, we are on the go most of each day...the gym, grocery store, parks, etc...today, I needed to take it easy...try explaining that to a "high-energy" 3-year-old. After staying inside the entire day, we were all getting on each other's nerves. I will admit, I perhaps snapped a couple of times when a simple, "Please, stop" would have sufficed. I also denied their request to play outside, because I just did not have it in me to supervise outside today. But, I also know that they can't possibly (nor should they) understand that.
So, after dinner, as bedtime drew near, I began to feel guilty. I think most parents will also admit that we can sometimes be our own toughest critics. But, there wasn't anything I could do to change the day, and so we began our bedtime routine. Our routine consists of a healthy bedtime snack, a story, prayers, singing Amazing Grace together, and then (all pediatricians, please stop reading. :-) )we snuggle with each and every one of them for one song of their instrumental Christian CD.
Most nights, we flow through this routine almost robotically...but not tonight. As I gazed at my babies' precious faces as they fell asleep, I was absolutely overcome with gratitude to God for making children so pure and forgiving. David didn't remember me not letting him play outside when he got home from Nana and Papa's today. He reached over and held my hand while we snuggled. My almost 7 year-old 1st baby curled up next to me and told me how much she loves "mommy snuggles." Olivia, ( after rolling away from me and saying, "Mama, scwatch my back, pwease") simply whispered, "I lub you, Mama."
These moments are what I live for. These moments when love between a parent and child is so pure and stronger than anything. So, don't pay attention to what the "experts" say about making kids fall asleep on their own. Sometimes, the added security of Mommy or Daddy is all they want. And, I'm 100% positive that when they are grown up and on their own, I will never say, "I wish I wouldn't have snuggled with them as much." Enjoy your babies today!
Normally, we are on the go most of each day...the gym, grocery store, parks, etc...today, I needed to take it easy...try explaining that to a "high-energy" 3-year-old. After staying inside the entire day, we were all getting on each other's nerves. I will admit, I perhaps snapped a couple of times when a simple, "Please, stop" would have sufficed. I also denied their request to play outside, because I just did not have it in me to supervise outside today. But, I also know that they can't possibly (nor should they) understand that.
So, after dinner, as bedtime drew near, I began to feel guilty. I think most parents will also admit that we can sometimes be our own toughest critics. But, there wasn't anything I could do to change the day, and so we began our bedtime routine. Our routine consists of a healthy bedtime snack, a story, prayers, singing Amazing Grace together, and then (all pediatricians, please stop reading. :-) )we snuggle with each and every one of them for one song of their instrumental Christian CD.
Most nights, we flow through this routine almost robotically...but not tonight. As I gazed at my babies' precious faces as they fell asleep, I was absolutely overcome with gratitude to God for making children so pure and forgiving. David didn't remember me not letting him play outside when he got home from Nana and Papa's today. He reached over and held my hand while we snuggled. My almost 7 year-old 1st baby curled up next to me and told me how much she loves "mommy snuggles." Olivia, ( after rolling away from me and saying, "Mama, scwatch my back, pwease") simply whispered, "I lub you, Mama."
These moments are what I live for. These moments when love between a parent and child is so pure and stronger than anything. So, don't pay attention to what the "experts" say about making kids fall asleep on their own. Sometimes, the added security of Mommy or Daddy is all they want. And, I'm 100% positive that when they are grown up and on their own, I will never say, "I wish I wouldn't have snuggled with them as much." Enjoy your babies today!
Thursday, March 8, 2012
940 Saturdays
In the same week that I registered baby 2 out of 4 for Kindergarten, I read this in Parenting... "There are only 940 Saturdays between a child's birth and when he/she leaves for college.....If your child is 5 years old, 260 Saturdays are gone." Wow.
The article continued to discuss quality time with out children and what that means. It talks a lot about truly making an effort to spend time with our kids. Here's what I asked myself when I finished reading the article...I spend every single day with my babies...but am I present? I have four precious souls vying for my attention...am I giving it to them?
I would like to think that I am present most of the time...but here's how I knew I had some work to do. The other day, Olivia came to me with the most exciting (insert sarcasm here :-) ) conversation ever regarding her Barbies. As she was talking, I was in the middle of organizing bills and laundry and my response was a very unenthusiastic, "Yes, uh-huh....". Her response? "Mommy! Quit saying 'Yes, uh-huh!!!". Wow again. When my 3 year old knows I am only half-listening to her, it is clear to me I need to work on my response.
I've thought a lot about this short amount of time that I get them all to myself. Do I want to look back and know I did a great job with laundry? Or, am I going to wish that I had spent more time living in the moment and being truly present with these precious babies? This is just a guess, but I am fairly certain that I will not remember the loads of laundry that piled up or the clutter in the corner. What I will remember are the precious moments that only come once. The kids all playing house together, the first trip to Disney World, David telling me not to worry because he will always live with me so I don't have to ever miss him, and the innocent grin Madison gets when she talks about her first "boyfriend".
Let's be present with our children...look them in the eyes when they talk to you...what they have to say to you truly IS the most important thing that day.
Took this from one of the kids' vacation bible school CD's..."This is the day God has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it."
The article continued to discuss quality time with out children and what that means. It talks a lot about truly making an effort to spend time with our kids. Here's what I asked myself when I finished reading the article...I spend every single day with my babies...but am I present? I have four precious souls vying for my attention...am I giving it to them?
I would like to think that I am present most of the time...but here's how I knew I had some work to do. The other day, Olivia came to me with the most exciting (insert sarcasm here :-) ) conversation ever regarding her Barbies. As she was talking, I was in the middle of organizing bills and laundry and my response was a very unenthusiastic, "Yes, uh-huh....". Her response? "Mommy! Quit saying 'Yes, uh-huh!!!". Wow again. When my 3 year old knows I am only half-listening to her, it is clear to me I need to work on my response.
I've thought a lot about this short amount of time that I get them all to myself. Do I want to look back and know I did a great job with laundry? Or, am I going to wish that I had spent more time living in the moment and being truly present with these precious babies? This is just a guess, but I am fairly certain that I will not remember the loads of laundry that piled up or the clutter in the corner. What I will remember are the precious moments that only come once. The kids all playing house together, the first trip to Disney World, David telling me not to worry because he will always live with me so I don't have to ever miss him, and the innocent grin Madison gets when she talks about her first "boyfriend".
Let's be present with our children...look them in the eyes when they talk to you...what they have to say to you truly IS the most important thing that day.
Took this from one of the kids' vacation bible school CD's..."This is the day God has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it."
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